Pressing Forward

Ok, so I asked my mom tonight if she remember where my wedding ring is. I know that when my ex and I seperated she kept the ring for me. So we looked and looked for it and we cannot find it. It is not like I have any value to it except that it was mine. It is just one more thing to make me realize how over things really are. I am praying everyday that God will help me get through the pain. I do know that we were designed to be filled with God and sometimes we try to put everything into the space and it just does not work.

I am going to have a funeral service (to symbolize that I am leaving the past behind and not looking back) when I am finished with divorce care please pray for me while I continue on my journey of love and loss. I know if I keep my focus on God he will give me the desires of my heart and in his time I will have someone.

It is hard right now because I am praying and seeking God with all my heart right now and the devil does not like that so he is fighting me every step of the way.

Philippians 3:13-14
Brother, I do not consider myslef yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do; Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on towards the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

This, That and the other....

It has been a while since I have posted on my blog.
Since I have canceled my space account
I thought that now is a great time to get back at this. Well, I have had a rough week. Only through my own noseness. God has brought it to my attention that
I am not over my past and I need to get help in order to move on.
I made several steps already...
1. Canceled my my space account( that was getting me in trouble)
2. I started reading my book again, "Do You Think I'm Beautiful?" by Angela Thomas (very smart and wise counsel)
3. I joined Gathsemane Baptist Church (now I have a home)

Those are the first steps I am going to go to counseling. This is the year that
I get back with God and get straight. No more pain....

Let me share with you some things from Angela's book that has helped me:

"Maybe the painful scars of our past should doom us to a life of limping. Maybe the consequences of sin should label us outcasts and relegate us to the damaged bin. Maybe you deserve ashes. They are your cross to bear. Your thorn to endure. But God delights in giving out mercy. His mercy is not just for someone else. It's for you and for me. He wants to come into your darkest night and hold back the storm that threatens to take your life. He wants to be strength where you have none. He wants to make life turn out differently than it should have for a woman who's been marred by great pain."

Wow!!! Unbelievable!!! God delights in giving out mercy.... He trades beauty for ashes... I never understood what that meant but now I am beginning to see that He makes all things new. It gets really tiresome and heavy carrying baggages around. Leave that behind at the cross where the blood is shed to set us free. I say this to you to say the same to me.